Then: 90210 Now: same zip different show…The Hills
Then: Psyche! Now: J/K
Then: Baby Sitters Club Now: Twighlight
Then: Tapered Leg Jeans Now: Skinny Jeans
Then: Tight Rolled Jeans Now: Boots over Jeans
Then: Doogie Howser Now: How I Met Your Mother
Then: Saved by the Bell Now: The Office
Then: Crimper Now: Flat Iron
Then: Talk Soup Now: The Soup
Then: Billy Ray Now: Miley
Then: Atari Now: Wii
Then: Cordless Phone Now: Smart Phone
Then: Cassettes Now: MP3s
Then: Riding in the back of a Station Wagon Now: Riding in the back of an SUV
Then: ???????? Now: Facebook….seriously, what did we do before Facebook?
Then: Disposable Cameras Now: Digital Cameras
Then: Jolly Ranchers in Zima Now: Flavored Vodka & Soda
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Thursday, June 24, 2010
HOT COP
Tips on how to get out of a speeding ticket...like I did last night.
Rule #1. Act like you had no idea why you were pulled over ( I totally knew. I saw him sitting on the side of the road and then seen him pull out after me)
Rule #2. If rule #1 doesn't work, be honest.."yes office, I guess I was speeding. I think I was going 70 in a 55, I am so sorry" (I was really going 75--had to pee, small bladder)
Rule #3. Be patient
Rule #4. Be personable (when he came back with my warning, I ask him what his name was "what's your name sir? Officer Ben Harty, thank you so much. This won't happen again.)
Rule #5. Smile and bat your eyes
Rule #6. If all above fails...CRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Always works. LOL
Rule #1. Act like you had no idea why you were pulled over ( I totally knew. I saw him sitting on the side of the road and then seen him pull out after me)
Rule #2. If rule #1 doesn't work, be honest.."yes office, I guess I was speeding. I think I was going 70 in a 55, I am so sorry" (I was really going 75--had to pee, small bladder)
Rule #3. Be patient
Rule #4. Be personable (when he came back with my warning, I ask him what his name was "what's your name sir? Officer Ben Harty, thank you so much. This won't happen again.)
Rule #5. Smile and bat your eyes
Rule #6. If all above fails...CRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Always works. LOL
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Things NOT to say to a SINGLE Girl
1. It happens when you're not looking.
This is just bull. Some people find people when they're looking; some don't. You're not doing anything wrong by going out and meeting people.
2. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
3. So, why are you single?
I generally dislike this question. I mean honestly, if I knew why, I don't think I would be single right now, now would I?!
4. You're too picky.
This may be true, but it feels like I'm getting criticized for my taste, vision, and close-mindedness — when I'm already down
5. You'll find the right person for you.
6. He's out there
Where?
7. It was just bad timing.
8. Just have fun with it!
Um, don't tell me how to date in my thirties when you got married at 24.
9. Have you tried online dating?
"Duh!
10. He just wasn't the right guy for you.
"I know! That's what I'm complaining about!
11. Well, when my boyfriend and I first got together…
"Wait, I still want to talk about me.
12. When the time is right, you will meet someone.
13. Wow, I wish I were single and in your shoes!
Really?! I'm pretty sure you CAN be single if you actually want to be. That there is an attainable dream, so if you aren't messing with me right now out of pity (which I suspect you are), please go for it!
14. Your turn next [at weddings].
15. It will happen when you least expect it.
16. Some guy is going to come along and ruin your career/life plans.
17. But you're so pretty! Why don't you have a boyfriend?
There's just no graceful way to answer that.
18. It just wasn't meant to be.
This is exponentially more annoying when coming from the mouths of marrieds.
Alright already...We know...so don't tell us this crap anymore!
And the number 1 thing single girls say that is a bunch of crap "I like being single"
No we don't...really? Who likes to sit at home doing nothing when all their couple friends are together having movie night...and NOBODY like the "dry spell"
This is just bull. Some people find people when they're looking; some don't. You're not doing anything wrong by going out and meeting people.
2. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
3. So, why are you single?
I generally dislike this question. I mean honestly, if I knew why, I don't think I would be single right now, now would I?!
4. You're too picky.
This may be true, but it feels like I'm getting criticized for my taste, vision, and close-mindedness — when I'm already down
5. You'll find the right person for you.
6. He's out there
Where?
7. It was just bad timing.
8. Just have fun with it!
Um, don't tell me how to date in my thirties when you got married at 24.
9. Have you tried online dating?
"Duh!
10. He just wasn't the right guy for you.
"I know! That's what I'm complaining about!
11. Well, when my boyfriend and I first got together…
"Wait, I still want to talk about me.
12. When the time is right, you will meet someone.
13. Wow, I wish I were single and in your shoes!
Really?! I'm pretty sure you CAN be single if you actually want to be. That there is an attainable dream, so if you aren't messing with me right now out of pity (which I suspect you are), please go for it!
14. Your turn next [at weddings].
15. It will happen when you least expect it.
16. Some guy is going to come along and ruin your career/life plans.
17. But you're so pretty! Why don't you have a boyfriend?
There's just no graceful way to answer that.
18. It just wasn't meant to be.
This is exponentially more annoying when coming from the mouths of marrieds.
Alright already...We know...so don't tell us this crap anymore!
And the number 1 thing single girls say that is a bunch of crap "I like being single"
No we don't...really? Who likes to sit at home doing nothing when all their couple friends are together having movie night...and NOBODY like the "dry spell"
Monday, June 14, 2010
Winsted/Winstock 2010
Well, it's Monday now. After a long weekend of binge drinking, it's back to work. The weather didn't hold out quite like we would have wanted it too, but it was still a blast. The group consisted of myself, Jill, Jody, Eric, Emily, Zach, Michelle, Dan, Chris, Mary, Tony, Jessi, Thomas and Brady. It was a wild and crazy group. We got up to Winsted around 6 pm on Friday and that's when the trouble started...apparently the rain cause one of the wrist band stations to close, and no one thought it was appropriate to put up signs to direct us where to go, so asking drunk people was REAl fun. Plus, when everyone else is drunk and you are sober...wow, that's annoying. People would not move out of our way. After a 20 minutes, we finally got our wristbands and we able to head to our campsite, set up came and start our drinking. Its a good thing we had trucks, because there was litteraly 3 feet of mud we had to drive through. After the campsite was set up, we were on our way to the Shit Show.
We made it to the concert, which was a blast, then decided on our way home to head to the Big Green Bus for a dance party. I apparently was on a mission to make out with someone, so I had to pick out the one guy, who I thought was cute, and hit on him. Well, I succeeded at my mission. Michelle had to pull me away finally so I could catch my breath. After that, well, it was time to go. In the moring, Emily had to remind me of my drunkness with a picture of me and this random kissing and dancing. Gotta love the picture proof.
Day 2 wasn't a whole lot better. The rain started right away, but that didnt' stop us...Jody, Eric, Shell and Dan decided they were going to head to the bar and wait out the rain..which ended up being till about 4 in the afternoon. I don't think I have ever seen Shell and Dan so drunk. They decided to take and nap, and after their nap they decided to give everyone a "sneak peak". The door to their tent did not fully zip up so we got to see Dan and Shell in rare form. It was great. I think that's what got us started on the topic...but Tony asked the funniest question...He asked if girls get limp vagina like how guys can get whiskey dick. I said probably not. LOL.
Well that was mainly the weekend, partying/ drinking all day in the rain and mud and talking about limp vaginas. We will definetely go next year for some more great adventures. TTYL
We made it to the concert, which was a blast, then decided on our way home to head to the Big Green Bus for a dance party. I apparently was on a mission to make out with someone, so I had to pick out the one guy, who I thought was cute, and hit on him. Well, I succeeded at my mission. Michelle had to pull me away finally so I could catch my breath. After that, well, it was time to go. In the moring, Emily had to remind me of my drunkness with a picture of me and this random kissing and dancing. Gotta love the picture proof.
Day 2 wasn't a whole lot better. The rain started right away, but that didnt' stop us...Jody, Eric, Shell and Dan decided they were going to head to the bar and wait out the rain..which ended up being till about 4 in the afternoon. I don't think I have ever seen Shell and Dan so drunk. They decided to take and nap, and after their nap they decided to give everyone a "sneak peak". The door to their tent did not fully zip up so we got to see Dan and Shell in rare form. It was great. I think that's what got us started on the topic...but Tony asked the funniest question...He asked if girls get limp vagina like how guys can get whiskey dick. I said probably not. LOL.
Well that was mainly the weekend, partying/ drinking all day in the rain and mud and talking about limp vaginas. We will definetely go next year for some more great adventures. TTYL
Saturday, June 12, 2010
I Hate.... Celebrity Edition
I hate Spencer Pratt
I hate Heidi Montag
I hate it when celebrities that have no grasp on what is really going on in the world get involved in politics
I hate how Kristen Stewart always looks pissed off when she is one of the luckiest actresses on earth for getting picked to be in movies that will be insanely successful regardless if they are actually good
I hate that famous people get everything for free
I hate it when they do concerts or appearances to try and convince average Americans to give money to their favorite charitable cause...give your own money, you obviously have plenty
I hate Micheal Moore, he is such a clueless D-Bag
I hate Kanye West, again what a D-Bag
I hate that Brett Favre's ego is bigger than the game of football
I hate the cast of The View
I hate Oprah
I hate TomKat
I hate the way Kristin Cavalari talks
I hate it when celebrities whine about the paparazzi...you chose to be famous, deal with it
I hate Dr Phil
I hate Carrot Top
I hate Heidi Montag
I hate it when celebrities that have no grasp on what is really going on in the world get involved in politics
I hate how Kristen Stewart always looks pissed off when she is one of the luckiest actresses on earth for getting picked to be in movies that will be insanely successful regardless if they are actually good
I hate that famous people get everything for free
I hate it when they do concerts or appearances to try and convince average Americans to give money to their favorite charitable cause...give your own money, you obviously have plenty
I hate Micheal Moore, he is such a clueless D-Bag
I hate Kanye West, again what a D-Bag
I hate that Brett Favre's ego is bigger than the game of football
I hate the cast of The View
I hate Oprah
I hate TomKat
I hate the way Kristin Cavalari talks
I hate it when celebrities whine about the paparazzi...you chose to be famous, deal with it
I hate Dr Phil
I hate Carrot Top
Friday, June 11, 2010
I hate...
Tosh.0, one of my favorite comedian gave me a great idea. I guess the new thing on the internet now is of people posting everything they hate...so here I go
I hate guys with chubby calves
I hate it when guys wear skinny jeans
I hate pork chops
I hate rain..unless its a thunderstorm
I hate spiders
I hate Nicolas Cage
I hate stinky patients--bathe before I touch you
I hate it when someone asks me if I watch South Park, and when I say "no" they say "really, it's so funny" I don't think so
I hate nails on a chalk board
I hate the sound of people biting their nails
I hate snot and boogers
I hate bad sex
I hate it when gay guys talk in a higher voice--we all know that's not your real voice
I hate people who try to bring down a fun situation---just have fun!
I hate it when I am on the computer and my internet is slow
I hate people who drive slow in the left lane
I hate it when people chew with their mouths open--close it
I hate it when patients talk on their cell phones when I am in the room--rude
I hate summer allergies
I hate paying cover at a bar for a dumb band
I hate it when people try to fit into clothes that are obviously too small for them
I hate the Rambo movies
I hate it when Bret Michaels purses his lips when he takes a picture
I hate how Kristen Cavalari talks
I hate it when I shave my legs then get goose bumps and the hair grows right back
And I hate bosses
That's all I hate for now
I hate guys with chubby calves
I hate it when guys wear skinny jeans
I hate pork chops
I hate rain..unless its a thunderstorm
I hate spiders
I hate Nicolas Cage
I hate stinky patients--bathe before I touch you
I hate it when someone asks me if I watch South Park, and when I say "no" they say "really, it's so funny" I don't think so
I hate nails on a chalk board
I hate the sound of people biting their nails
I hate snot and boogers
I hate bad sex
I hate it when gay guys talk in a higher voice--we all know that's not your real voice
I hate people who try to bring down a fun situation---just have fun!
I hate it when I am on the computer and my internet is slow
I hate people who drive slow in the left lane
I hate it when people chew with their mouths open--close it
I hate it when patients talk on their cell phones when I am in the room--rude
I hate summer allergies
I hate paying cover at a bar for a dumb band
I hate it when people try to fit into clothes that are obviously too small for them
I hate the Rambo movies
I hate it when Bret Michaels purses his lips when he takes a picture
I hate how Kristen Cavalari talks
I hate it when I shave my legs then get goose bumps and the hair grows right back
And I hate bosses
That's all I hate for now
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Dating Rules 101
Now just because I am not married or in a relationship, doesn't mean I am not an expert on dating...So boys, listen up...here are a few rules to follow if you want to date myself or Jenny....or any women...
1.Must be 6 feet or taller...(this mainly applies for Jenny and myself)
2. Get a college education (Jenny and I are not dumb...we wont' stand it if you are)
3. Don't wear a baseball cap crooked...it's meant to be worn in front..and shape the bill...looks so ghetto if it's straight...oh, and cut the tags off...we don't care how much you paid for it.
4. If you ask us on a date..expect to pay...if we ask you...pay too! LOL You should be lucky we are going out with you. Third date...maybe split or if we like you, we will pay. But ask us to go Dutch on the first date and you are going alone on your second.
5. NEVER, I mean NEVER wear skinny jeans..they are meant for girls, and honestly, even some girls can't pull it off...Plus if you are that skinny where you can fit into them, go bulk up...we don't want a guy skinner than us.
6. The less body hair, the better. We don't like a guy to have a permant sweater on. GROSS
7. If you are going bald...just shave it. No one wants to date George Costanza.
8. Don't order girly drinks....we WILL think you are gay!
9. Mandanas/ Bandanas are only for Harley riders...someone NEEDS to tell that to Bret Michaels. If you wear one, we expect to be going on your bike later.
10. Last one for today.. Boys, NEVER tell us that another women is prettier than us.. We have insecurities as well....one good way to guarantee NO SEX..and while we are on the subject...don't ever push our heads to the "man zone" we will go there if we want to, but we too expect something in return.
Alright ladies...and guys...feel free to add to this.
1.Must be 6 feet or taller...(this mainly applies for Jenny and myself)
2. Get a college education (Jenny and I are not dumb...we wont' stand it if you are)
3. Don't wear a baseball cap crooked...it's meant to be worn in front..and shape the bill...looks so ghetto if it's straight...oh, and cut the tags off...we don't care how much you paid for it.
4. If you ask us on a date..expect to pay...if we ask you...pay too! LOL You should be lucky we are going out with you. Third date...maybe split or if we like you, we will pay. But ask us to go Dutch on the first date and you are going alone on your second.
5. NEVER, I mean NEVER wear skinny jeans..they are meant for girls, and honestly, even some girls can't pull it off...Plus if you are that skinny where you can fit into them, go bulk up...we don't want a guy skinner than us.
6. The less body hair, the better. We don't like a guy to have a permant sweater on. GROSS
7. If you are going bald...just shave it. No one wants to date George Costanza.
8. Don't order girly drinks....we WILL think you are gay!
9. Mandanas/ Bandanas are only for Harley riders...someone NEEDS to tell that to Bret Michaels. If you wear one, we expect to be going on your bike later.
10. Last one for today.. Boys, NEVER tell us that another women is prettier than us.. We have insecurities as well....one good way to guarantee NO SEX..and while we are on the subject...don't ever push our heads to the "man zone" we will go there if we want to, but we too expect something in return.
Alright ladies...and guys...feel free to add to this.
Things I don't understand
1. How do some people get engaged, married, divorced, and then engaged and married again before I can even get a boyfriend? Relationship jumpers!
2. Why is it that all the tall boys date short girls? Hello, us tall girls need the tall men...SO STOP TAKING THEM SHORT GIRLS!
3. Why does it seem like all the hot guys date the ugly girls, but want to "have fun" with the pretty girls? What, you can't take us home to mom?
4. When a guy asks you out, and you keep declining the date...why don't they the clue that we just don't want to go out with you? We are trying to be nice by saying we are busy...take the hint!
5. Why is it when guys sleep around they are "pimps" but when girls do we are "sluts"? The thing that guys don't understand is if we are sleeping with you on the first date, we don't want to see YOU again either. It goes both way boys.
One day I hope to figure this all out. Please enlighten me if you know any thing.
Lindsay
2. Why is it that all the tall boys date short girls? Hello, us tall girls need the tall men...SO STOP TAKING THEM SHORT GIRLS!
3. Why does it seem like all the hot guys date the ugly girls, but want to "have fun" with the pretty girls? What, you can't take us home to mom?
4. When a guy asks you out, and you keep declining the date...why don't they the clue that we just don't want to go out with you? We are trying to be nice by saying we are busy...take the hint!
5. Why is it when guys sleep around they are "pimps" but when girls do we are "sluts"? The thing that guys don't understand is if we are sleeping with you on the first date, we don't want to see YOU again either. It goes both way boys.
One day I hope to figure this all out. Please enlighten me if you know any thing.
Lindsay
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
And so it begins 2.0
This is Jenny. Linz summed us up pretty well so I'll just add a little more...We are both reality TV junkies, especially when it comes to The Hills and The City. Which is why it is extremely painful to admit that while watching a recent episode of The Hills I realized how similar we are to Kristin who we both love to hate. The particular episode I'm referring to is when Kristin and Stacy go out to a different bar to look for boys. Their night ended up being like a typical night out for me and Linz except that Linz and I HAVE and ARE way more FUN. Even when there is an utter lack of good looking boys with any potential at all, we still make the best of the night and have an absolute blast.
Jen
P.S. Also during this episode of The Hills I realized why I get so annoyed every time that Kristin talks...she sticks her lips out with every word she says...so annoying!!!
Jen
P.S. Also during this episode of The Hills I realized why I get so annoyed every time that Kristin talks...she sticks her lips out with every word she says...so annoying!!!
And so it begins
Well...where to start. This is Lindsay. You will also be hearing from my friend Jenny. The 2 of us are inseparable...except this weekend. (I am heading to Winstock Country Fest--Jenny hates country music). We decided we needed to start a blog and write down all of our endeavors because, well, they are pretty entertaining. A little background on myself... I am single, 5'9, 29 years old, currently live with my parents (long story)...and I am a chiropractor. Jenny is single, 5'11, 29 years old, owns her own place (jealous) and is a successful finacial analyst. Now the reason I tell you our height is because you will hear of many of stories about us and short men. It seems like all the the tall men are taken..thus leaving us with the short boys....Not fair. Well, that's all I have for now....stay tuned for some great stories/adventures.
Lindsay
Lindsay
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